MR DYKE AND THE ‘FAGGOT’ #BBCfatwa #fairytaleofnewyork

A Mr Alex Dyke, a radio disc jockey for the BBC outfit has decided to ban Fairytale of New York, a song written by Jem Finer and Shane Mcgowan, and sung by Kirsty McColl accompanying Mcgowan.

Now before I go on, I’d best lay my cards on the table. When it comes to economics, politics, social justice, law & so on I am a socialist and believe in complete equality of treatment, of access, and of opportunity.

But when it comes to the arts I am, like Lenin & Trotsky, a believer in a very definite hierarchy – some artists are unreachably greater than all the rest. With the caveat that great artists can – with luck and opportunity – rise up from anywhere. Shane Mcgowan was a homeless london street addict in his teens, remember.

Which makes the spectacle of the decidedly talentless Mr Dyke issueing a cultural fatwa against the Pogues and the McColls a little like a tiny squeaky little mouseen telling elephants where in the jungle they may walk.

No doubt there is a streak of anti-irish prejudice in Mr Dyke’s fatwa. It must stick in the craw of the likes of him that the two of the greatest xmas songs of all time – fairytale & happy xmas war is over by John Lennon – were written by Irish people. The BBC has always been an anti- irish propaganda machine. But it is also, as any british labour party supporter will tell you, an anti-british propaganda unit – unless you are an organiser of genocide like Tony Blair or an international paedophile ring like the family referred to by gobshites as ‘royal’ – then they are all for you.

So lets not play the nationalist card in our response – that only makes us as thick as the BBC like to think we are. BBC, mouthpiece for a zombie empire whose last decaying limbs are beginning to shave off and decompose as we speak – tries to shape the thoughts, emotions, and actions of all of its victims no matter where they are from. And lets not pretend we don’t have the same kinds of mullet-headed assholes on the Irish airwaves. Scumbag that Dyke may be, he’s nowt compared to fash scumbags like Niall Boylan.

According to Mr Dyke

“I think Christmas songs should be about excited children, toys, Christmas trees, snowy streets, ski lodges, reindeer, wrapping paper, Santa, family, peace on earth and love.”

We might ask Mr Dyke if he has heard of the Catholic Church, or Christianity in general, and it’s associations with war, mass child abuse, the oppression of females and non-cis identities. After he has read up on all this perhaps he will be banning xmas songs with a religious theme as, despite what they say, they have sfa all to do with peace & love? But of course there is little point in trying to explain complex ideas to a BBC DJ.

Mr Dyke Esq. goes on to say the song is ‘an offensive pile of down market chav bilge’. Now ‘chav’ – the english equivalent of the K word – is at least as offensive as the F word. But the BBC have never minded class prejudice – sure aren’t they built on it entirely?

Lest we think that Mr Dyke is some kind of champion of the oppressed, let is cast our mind back to the last time he tried a bit of cheap controversy in an attempt to get his sliding rating up. That, back in 2015, was his attack on public breastfeeding which he declared an offensive activity which was ‘not natural’ & ‘should be stopped’. Now we all know the kind of man who objects to hungry babies getting the best nourishment available – perverts who can’t control themselves and just have to get a peek in, right? It’s a challenging planet right now for women-hating men like that, what with the women trying to claim an eency weency bit of public space of perverts and rapists an’ all’

For those who need it, & I hope that is not too many of you here is the great irish bards explanation for the use of the F word:

“The word was used by the character because it fitted with the way she would speak and with her character,” he said. “She is not supposed to be a nice person, or even a wholesome person. She is a woman of a certain generation at a certain time in history and she is down on her luck and desperate.”

Shane also said the dialogue was “as accurate as I could make it but she is not intended to offend! She is just supposed to be an authentic character and not all characters in songs and stories are angels or even decent and respectable, sometimes characters in songs and stories have to be evil or nasty in order to tell the story effectively.”

Now, if you don’t get this and accept it, it’s because you are thick. Too thick for songs, books, films, plays…stay well away from all of it for your own good, you poor oul catur – stick to the BBC! Or else you will find yourself in a constant state of rage, on top of your stupid, which is a lot to bear.

Finally, on behalf of the Bards of Ireland I issue this fairytale hex on Mr Dyke:

Little Mouseman – HEAR THIS!!!
Should you ever
Set foot in Ireland
Your nose will grow
To its true length
And end in Manhattan
So that when you blow
Your xmas cocaine out of it
It will snow in New York
Just as Shane sings it

Dave Lordan